Warning: Language and graphic information. If you either offend easily or gross out easily do not read this. If you read this and end up reporting me or bitching me out for it, there will be Hades to pay. I am not in the mood for it and I am just waiting to tear someone into bite size bits and feed them to my animals. Try me and see if I don't.

On to the news~
Thursday morning (May 8th) I went to the bathroom at work and found blood. I told my sister when she picked me up from work. We went to the hospital and spent the next three hours there. They took an internal exam and the doctor said that my cervix was open a couple inches which was not good(side note: do you know how unnerving it is to lay prone like that and hear the doctor between your legs mumbling "well that's not good. that's bad"?). He sent me to the lady to do an internal ultrasound. For those that don't know, the day this was taken I was 9 1/2 weeks along. She told me the heartbeat was 138bpm and that the measurement calculated I was 7 1/2 weeks. The doctor looked at that and said again "that's not good". He took the blood they had drawn to do an HGC measurement (again, those that don't know, that is the hormones that a pregnancy test measures to tell you if you are pregnant). Early in pregnancy, those levels are suppose to double over and again. He told me to come back on the 12th to take more blood and measure them again. I went back Monday and my levels had dropped about 700. I have been bleeding for over a week straight, and cramping badly. I have to go to the fucking doctor tomorrow morning for them to clean out everything. I really don't want to go. I cried all day Monday and have been in a half trance since. Before you all start in...I like facts, facts are good. I don't want to hear the crap I have heard already. So please, none of the "it will be okay" or "everything happens for a reason" or "God/the Gods work/s in mysterious ways". I know it will be okay. It will eventually. I will get through this. I know things happen for a reason. I live that every day. This baby's soul most likely just needed to feel a mother's early love and that soul is now either getting ready for a new life or is happy in the Summerled (Summerland, OtherWorld, Tech Duinn, where ever you wish to name). I also know that my Gods have their reasons for doing as they do and it is not wise to question them.
To my LiveJournal readers: I am still working on the birthday fics I promised. One of them is coming along wonderfully and should be out soon. It is a great means of distraction.
To my DeviantArt readers: Same thing applies, I am working on the birthday fics and they should be out sooner than later. For those that read the journal post birthday fics and stress, you now know why I said I might not finish the story. Now I have to say that unless you want it to turn into a tragedy, it will not be finished. Now if some of you want a tragic character death, let me know, and I will finish the story up with one more chapter after I finish the three birthday fics.
To my Cafemom readers: Dear Slytherins, I do not know how much I can be on here the next week or so. I have to delete the icon and the ticker for the pregnancy and that is going to hurt. I don't want to lose my position as Head of House, but I might not be on here that much for a week maybe two. I will try, but I know for a fact I will not be on tomorrow night. The day after is an iffy. It is according to how I feel not only physically but mentally as well. If that is a problem or someone doesn't like that, please let me know and I will understand.

To everyone else: If you read all this and became offended, even after my warning...Fuck with me, please. I would love to see you try. I would really love a good fight right now. You know who you are.

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I am Head of Slytherin House on Cafemom.com club Mom's Who Love Harry Potter!!

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